Today I am grateful for:
Forgiveness from the one who relies on me the most
Early morning snuggles
Monday mornings after calm, comforting weekends
A piping hot Chai tea latte
Feeling seen
Fun plans with my Susie-bean
A safe soulmate despite the car wreck
Pictures from school
Some one-on-one (one-on-two?) time with my mama
Finding some peace with my path
A quieter week at work
Gift registries
Amazon Prime, for when life is too busy for even the basic stuff
A specially-made family picture for me to hang at work
Anticipating Halloween activities with my little Moana
Monday, October 23, 2017
Wednesday, October 11, 2017
On dragonflies
My beloved aunt, Liane, passed away on October 1. She had been sick for several months but the decline in her health was rapid and she passed away quickly. Almost unexpectedly. It hurts, unbearably at times.
I have spent some time overcome with grief and I do not try to hide it from Ruby. I want her to know that it is ok to love, it is ok to grieve, it is ok to cry. She sits with me quietly and strokes my arm and lays her head against my chest. Somehow, she makes this loss somewhat less unbearable.
My heart hurts for me: I loved and connected with Liane in a beautiful way. My heart hurts as much for her husband, kids, and siblings (my mom). She was a truly beautiful person. She was like a cozy, crackling fireplace on a crisp evening. I only wanted to be nearer to her to warm up. I think that's how everyone who knew her felt.
Her memorial service proved that true. Never have I been to a service like that; one that was so fitting, so comforting, so tender and gentle, and so full of love as hers. Everyone who spoke had genuine words of love and adoration for her. She dedicated her life to loving and taking care of others. They spoke of her nature: loving, kind, giving, and never one to complain. How she had her passions in life, but none topped that of her family. I walked away from that service appreciating her more than I maybe ever had.
Always, I adored her and loved to be with her. She never forgot a detail, a birthday. She made quiet, odd-ball me feel special, interesting, and especially loved. I realized at the service, that was her gift. She loved people and make them feel special and valued. She didn't just love them in her heart, she loved them with her words, her intentions, her actions. I truly can't think of a more beautiful legacy to leave than that. It inspires me to do the same.
I have spent some time overcome with grief and I do not try to hide it from Ruby. I want her to know that it is ok to love, it is ok to grieve, it is ok to cry. She sits with me quietly and strokes my arm and lays her head against my chest. Somehow, she makes this loss somewhat less unbearable.
My heart hurts for me: I loved and connected with Liane in a beautiful way. My heart hurts as much for her husband, kids, and siblings (my mom). She was a truly beautiful person. She was like a cozy, crackling fireplace on a crisp evening. I only wanted to be nearer to her to warm up. I think that's how everyone who knew her felt.
Her memorial service proved that true. Never have I been to a service like that; one that was so fitting, so comforting, so tender and gentle, and so full of love as hers. Everyone who spoke had genuine words of love and adoration for her. She dedicated her life to loving and taking care of others. They spoke of her nature: loving, kind, giving, and never one to complain. How she had her passions in life, but none topped that of her family. I walked away from that service appreciating her more than I maybe ever had.
Always, I adored her and loved to be with her. She never forgot a detail, a birthday. She made quiet, odd-ball me feel special, interesting, and especially loved. I realized at the service, that was her gift. She loved people and make them feel special and valued. She didn't just love them in her heart, she loved them with her words, her intentions, her actions. I truly can't think of a more beautiful legacy to leave than that. It inspires me to do the same.
Rest well, Liane. I love you. We'll see you again...
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